Ya Allah, I am so pained!

Ya Allah,

I apologize that I have to ‘pray’now to You though I should know that You already know what is in my heart. Maybe because I was born strong but I grew up weaker within the system that I have grown up in. Maybe I just need to write this to myself so that I can remember and repent too.

I know Allah that You have created us all out of love and to serve You in this temporary life before we are called back to You to live eternally. I do believe that You have “spoken” to us all through time through diverse languages. I do know also that You have not stopped giving us the signs and the brains to read them. But are we willing?

You have explained in great detail in the Quran about human nature and how we should live it.  But many, Oh God have forsaken Your Quran and Your scriptures.  Many.

You have been sending messages all though time through so many Messengers. Everyone wants to OWN the names of the Messengers for themselves while leaving behind their teachings. In the Messengers’ names, many lies have been created to further the liars’ selfish needs. Hence misery, division and enmity are evident when actually in the hearts of the believers it is LOVE that should prevail.

Many too, God, have erected idols besides you and worship these idols more than serve You. These idols come in the form of priests, scholars, politicians, wealth, families, self ego, glory, power, race, religion, fear, etc, etc..

Ya Allah, it is these idols that many worship today and think them real.  Even though often, these idols have failed them miserably yet they scream, shout, plunder and even kill to protect them but alas, in Your name.  The system, O Allah, is so perverted that evil is considered good and good is considered evil. Most are confused.

Do we not deserve a saviour or are we doomed? Have we strayed so far off Your Path?

But isn’t LOVE and JUSTICE the core of your teaching?

I cannot understand Ya Allah, why do they not use LOVE as the basis of inviting people to Your Path?  Do they not claim to Love You?

What can this one helpless slave of Yours do? I know it may even be arrogance to ask this. But forgive me My Lord, O Allah, O God, O Creator, in my eyes, I am the weakest and most sinful mortal that I can think of.  Being so weak and so sinful, I have no where else to turn but You. Please continue to guide me to be useful or just take me back as You will. The world is, after all, Yours as it has always been. It truly pains my heart to see so much vested interest floating around spurning more misery for the children of today who will have to inherit this earth soon.

I cannot even stop my tears from flowing as I write this. Forgive me My Lord, My Allah, My Creator.

Peace !