Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Of Breasts, Buttocks and Thighs.

What has this topic got to with Raperas?  Well, it has a lot to do with Raperas because it has to do with living issues.
I have often cautioned that “women are women’s greatest enemies” and “men are women’s greatest oppressors”. I always qualify this statement by saying that it is a general statement and therefore not true of ALL women or ALL men. There are many men and women who are content being the human being that they are, calmly accepting the biological and psychological differences between them. The fact is: irrespective of gender differences, not all human beings are the same. They differ in many aspect – psychologically, intellectually, culturally, financially, etc, etc, etc.  Hence, we cannot factually be correct when we say that “All men like…..” or “All women like to….” in all cases. 

Having said that, generalizations do assist as a discussion tool sometimes. For example, I can safely assume that ALL women like their dignity to be protected and upheld. However, we can get into sticky waters when we try to examine what “dignity” means to each person. Worse even when we want to inject concepts like “modesty”, “honour” and such. 

Now let me ask how will you reasonably respond if I say: “ I want girls to walk around flaunting their sexuality”.  Now that word “sexuality”. It is straightforward is it not? It has to do with sex and I can safely assume that most people will agree “sexual” is a private matter unless it a matter for education or intellectual discussion.  So, If I want and encourage girls to flaunt their sexuality to the maximum permissible in society, would that make me a “sick” person or a “normal” person? Would that make me a “respecter” of women or one who degrades women? 

I read in the Star today that “Some GT-grid girls are willing to don skimpy outfits for the opportunity to earn good money”. They start as early as 16 and 17 which in Malaysia is considered a minor for the purposes of having sexual relationship. Skimpy clothes means skimpy clothes ie let as little clothes as possible cover your body.  Go to the link of Staronline and view them to ascertain your reasonable response. 

It is interesting that the girls admit that their boyfriends do not like it but they do it nevertheless for money. However, some of the girls interviewed said that being a grid GT girl gave them confidence. I wonder if they have paused to think whether they are confusing confidence for familiarity. Once you get familiar enough with anything, you can do it “confidently” .

Some guy told me that it is nice to be a girl especially a pretty one with curves in the right place to become rich. He explained that being a women, you can “sell parts of your body” for money. You can show off your legs, or your breasts or your buttocks. It sells.  I was quite upset when I heard that because I thought it sounded demeaning of women.  After all, legs, buttocks and breasts are meat, skin and fat wrapped around bones same as mens’.  Biologically, it is factually what is. However, psychologically and culturally, it means something else – it reminds you of sex.  Or more correctly, it is meant to tease you or excite you. Is this wrong or right? 

Would you allow your daughter or wife to display parts of her sexuality for money? 

This kind of questions and the answers will determine what kind of society we are. 

Of course we are living in a society of cultural extremes. I know some who believe that women should be completely covered from head to toe to safeguard their honour. On the other, there are others who believe that each women has an absolute right to her body. Extreme positions like this do not excite me. 

I recall I had a debate with some girls when I was a student in UKM on the “proper and acceptable” swim wear for women. Of course, the girls held the position that bikinis and swimsuits are acceptable in the swimming pool or the beach. I asked if they would stand in front me clad only in their bra and panties. They shook their heads in disbelief and called me sick.

I asked: “What in the world is the difference between bra and panties and a bikini?”

They kept quiet.

I asked further: “You do no mind being in public clad in bikinis but you are hesitant to stand in front of me alone with bra and panties? Why?”

They replied; “We are shy la!”

I asked; “ Will you mind being in bra and panties if I leave the lecture room?”

They said “Of course la…we are all girls”.

I said: “ See? The fact is because I am a guy. But you fail to understand or refuse to understand that even at the swimming pool or beach, there are guys. You have conditioned your mind to expose yourself in public because you have been conditioned to believe it is ok!”

I can never understand that logic of being able to be almost nude in public but not in private!

I hope I am not being misunderstood in my post here. I am not moralizing and personally, I really have no strong views whether a person wants to be nude or wants to be completely wrapped up. However, I get irked when I see hypocritical stances in our society either due to acquired pretence or a result of a weak brain. 

Even issues like women’s attire has never been discussed rationally in our society. We only hear religious exhortations which bores me to death because I am more interested in evaluating reasons, effects and general consequences. Have you ever heard of a seminar or a forum held on “The purpose of clothing”. At this seminar it will be interesting to have a women panelist say “One purpose of clothing for a women is to show the whole world that she has thighs, breasts and buttocks”. 

What do you think?



jon pour do care said...

Salam Bro. Jay,

I think we should differentiate between 'dressing' for the occassion and 'dressing' for money. If you wear skimpy/sexy type looking dress just for the money then you might be allowing some party to 'abuse' your dignity or in other words, 'using you to make money' !

However, dressing for the occassion is something else. Take for instance, swimming at swimming pool or at the beach. Everyone knows what is a swimming attire. It is not the same as a bra and panties or bikini. A swimming attire has some safety elements. You cannot have heavy type of clothing in water. That is dangerous ! As for bikini, it was never a swimming attire. Those who wears bikins at beach, I think you and I knows the reason why they do so. A swimming attire may shows your 'sexiness' but safety overrule !

The same thing in sports. You cannot expect to break the 100 metres record by having a lot of clothing on you ! You should be light as much as possible. You may be wearing a thin and tight clothing and may make you look like wearing a skimpy type of clothing but the reason is to achieve excellence in that type of sport.

In tennis, you can see lady tennis players with such short skirts but what the heck man ! You are there to watch the game, right ! (or maybe I am wrong... uh!)

Jahamy said...

Jon Pour do Care,

I totally agree with you that one of the objectives of clothing is the safety element - from heat, from cold, for the safe purposes for which it is used (for example: swimming, working in a cold mine or even in outer space, etc).

it is actually the "emphasis" of why the clothing is worn that actually reflects upon the person doesn't it?

I have watched beach volleyball and often wondered why the women are often less clothed than the men. I find it amusing. Does the sport require that of women to excel in that sports?

And while we are on this topic, have you wondered why is it that some women go around showing off their navels or legs but men never do. Ah yes, some men do go around showing off their muscles on their arms..even this, why is that?

Anyway..have a good day.

Peace !

NJ said...

In (which) god We Trust